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Well Happy Easter!

Hi and good day to you!

easter

Hoping you all had as nice of an Easter weekend as we, what with temps in ChiTown within scratching-distance of 80-degrees. Even MBH asked that the winter-blanket be removed from the bed. Now THAT means it’s warming up in Da Nest.

 

The girls all came over for a visit along with spouse and sig-others. All in all, it was a beautiful day complemented by wonderful company. Hope all y’all did the same.

 

I’ll get started presently, however, just a few words. I have had several issues rattlin’ around inside my head about the unchallenged false-equivalencies the gun rights crowd invoke; Bruce Rauner, a guy whom in many ways reflects my ways of thinking, so why is it I’m not drawn like a moth to his flame?…and… the group which is surprisingly against stricter enforcement of Ella’s gun laws or any newer laws.

 

But, it’s the day after Easter; it’s warm and I want to get outside to get some yard work done while it’s gonna be a beauty of a day, as t’morra’s reverting back to crummy weather.

 

WABBIT SEASON

 

As we are wont to do, let us begin with our usual trip down memory lane, courtesy of historynet.com, historyorb.com and infoplease.com and see what we can see which occurred on this date in…

 

753BC,    According to tradition, after being suckled by a she-wolf, former orphans Romulus and Remus are said to have founded Rome. Quite the coincidence given what yesterday celebrated and the Romans’ involvement in its having come to fruition.

 

43BC,     Marc Antony is defeated by Julius Caesar’s nephew, Octavian, aka “Augustus” at the Battle of Mutina. Another interesting coincidence, in that had Augustus not ordered a census not too many tears later, a certain Nazarene and wife with child, would not have had to have trekked back to Bethlehem, which would eventually lead to this past weekend’s observances.

 

953AD,   Otto I, the Great, gave Utrechtans fishing rights. Nothing about free nightcrawlers, though.

 

1509,     The man who eventually established the Church of England, Henry VIII, was born.

 

1649,     Maryland, the territory established by Lord Baltimore, mainly as a “haven for New World Catholics”, passed the Maryland Toleration Act, allowing all people freedom of worship.

 

Lotsa religious stuff, huh? Never fear, things change.

 

1836,    Sam Houston defeated Santa Ana at the Battle of San Jacinto, gaining Teaxs’ independence from Mexico.

 

See? Told ya.

 

1862,    Congress established the US Mint in Denver Colorado.

 

1865,    Abraham Lincoln’s funeral train left Washington, DC.

 

1898,    Though not ratified by Congress until April 25th, what may have been America’s first “War of Choice”, which some say was fomented by newspapermen, Hearst and Pulitzer, The Spanish American War began, and, from which one of my fave Presidents, Teddy Roosevelt’ and his Rough Riders gained fame for their charge(s) up San Juan Hill.

 

1910,    One of my most favorite American writers, Samuel Clemens aka, “Mark Twain” died. He was a man who personified the words, “…the pen is mightier than the sword.”

 

1918,    After being shot down by Snoopy, the Flying Beagle, Manfred Von Richtofen, The Red Baron, was killed in an aerial dogfight. Pretty good one, huh? “Snoopy”…dogfight”?

 

1956,    “The King”, Elvis had his first hit record, “Heartbreak Hotel”, which hit #1-status.

 

1960,    Brasilia became the capital of Brazil. The only reason for including this is…and I don’t believe it…I still recall having to learn that in Sr. Salentia’s 6th-grade Geography class.

 

1980,    Rosie Ruiz was the first woman to cross the finish line at The Bahstehn Marathon by eenfahmoosly taking short cuts which allowed her to have done so.

 

1995,    Much to the chagrin of “The Black Helicopter” crowd, and after some outstanding police work, Timothy McVeigh was arrested in connection with the bombing of the Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City.

 

 

2008    The USAF “retired” its F-117, “Nighthawk” from active military service. I did not know that. You?

 

 

HEADLINES…

 

“Oscar Meyer wieners recalled over cheese”. Don’t know why they “preferred” to recall wieners over cheese but they did.

 

“Egg-thrower arrested for assault”. Let’s just leave this one with the thought that “someone” didn’t quite “get” the Easter season.

 

 

 

DUCK SEASON

 

TUBULARLY SPEAKING…

 

Who are the “stars” on “Dancing With The Stars”? I only ask this as MBH related an item from Parade Magazine which posed the question” “Do the men on DWTS wear as much spray tan as the ladies?” Quickly, the answer is , “no”. They do use some but not as much as the gals. But here’s what piqued my curiosity. Before setting down at the keyboard, I decided to give it a read. There’s a pic with this caption: “James Maslow and Peta Murgatroyd on DWTS”. The first thing that struck me was ” who the hell are James Maslow and Peta Murgatroyd”. I did recall Snaggletooth’s exclamation, “Heavens to Murgatroyd!”…or murgatroid. But what the hell is a “Maslow”. Turns out Peta…not named after the animal rights organization…is the professional dancer, making James Maslow her “star” of a partner. So, as I must admit, I’d never heard of the lad, I looked him up. Silly me! How did I NOT recognize him as one of “Big Time Rush”, a boy band around which Nickelodeon based a TV showoff the same name. Silly me.

 

Oops! Almost forgot, the entire reason for MBH mentioning this to me was this item: “The show goes through 20 t0 30 gallons of tanning spray in a season”. See? It’s all just for-real and in no way is it faked.

 

Didn’t get into much else this past weekend what with preps for yesterday on Saturday, which put me in the sack around 8:30…just about the time Moses took off for his first jaunt up Mt. Sinai, after which I fell asleep.

 

Also, with the family over and it having been Easter, we decided to skip “Game of Thrones” last night as, well, it WAS Easter. Will watch “G.O.T.”, tonight, along with “The Blacklist, which promises to be a revelatory episode as Lizzie confronts Tom with Redd in the wings. For Tom’s sake, sure hope “Berlin” paid him well as, well, we all know what happens to folks who mess with Redd.

 

OXYGEN has “Ocean’s Thirteen”…our fave of the franchise…tonight at 7:30 CDT.

 

AMC has, “Jaws” at 7:00 CDT.

 

A & E has “Duck Dynasty reruns. Looks like Phil’s out to boost ratings in that he, along with Draft-dodger Ted Nugent, stated their support for the black-helicopter crowd backing the deadbeat-rancher in Nevada.

 

We’ve kinda fallen out of love with “Mike and Molly”, in that it seems it’s fallen victim to the dysfunctional-formulaic sitcom trap.

Yes, their Moms were pretty archetypal, but THEY were not. Well, at least until this season. Too bad.

 

 

AND NOW…SPORT

 

Wanna know what Sports Hell is? Try being a ChiTown sports fan, whose fave team is DaFlubs! What I mean is, the only team which won over the weekend is the White Sox. To most Flubs fans, the White Sox may as well be from Mattoon, Il. So, that left us with our two, playoff teams, the Blackhawks and Bulls.

 

So, following my “non-participatory” following of DaHawks, my involvement in them was relegated to “flips” over to their game, last Thursday, which they’d led, 3-2, as far as my last “flip”, with 8-minutes left…which they lost in overtime, 4-3.

 

But wait! There’s more!

 

As I’d mentioned, we were rather busy Saturday, so much so that I’d forgotten they were on NBC that afternoon. By the time I tuned in…and it was just to catch the 5 o’clock News, they were between periods…the 3rd and Overtime…when they, again, lost. Not only did they lose the game, putting them down, 0-2; they also lost Brent Seabrook on a game misconduct…which he deserved for the hit he put on St. Lousy Center, Dave Backes…he was also suspended for 3-games, which unless they drastically turn things around, effectively ended his season.

 

 

But wait! There’s morer!

 

As many know, we had tix for yesterday’s Bulls game, hosting Washington. They got off to a bit of a slow start but by the mid-point of the 3rd-quarter, had built up a 13-point advantage. Then, Zeus only knows, they fell in to a jump-shot-happy “O”, taking – mostly – perimeter jump shots, with next to no one in position for any rebounds. What may have been the worst play was a 3 – on – 1 break, which they perverted into a 3-point baseline attempt, which clanged off the rim; became a fast break for Washington; which wound up in a 1 – on – 3 for them AND AN EFFIN’ BASKET!

 

Not to sound like a homer but they gave that game away. It seemed as if they were all 50-some-year-old trees; solidly rooted in place, as they hardly moved; did any kind of cutting; diving nor crashing the “paint”, thereby allowing the Wizards…who play a tough “D” to begin with…to just out-muscle them when they, DaBulls had the ball…and then, do the same when they, the Wizards, had possession.

 

One note and this is one of my pet peeves with the NBA. Early-on in the game, the fouls the refs called were just silly. I played in the old Parish League in high school. If my jersey…J-E-R-S-E-Y…happened to brush an opponent, it was a foul. These guys were worse…in the first half. In the second, though, they swallowed their whistles and it was, pretty much, anything goes. Granted, the Bulls guys shouldn’t have been crying to the refs. I’d said that during the game. That said and in fairness to both teams, calling “pitty-pat” fouls for 24-minutes, then coming out and acting as if they were officiating a Sumo-wrestling match for the last 24-minutes,  just doesn’t cut it. That, that said, the Wizards played through it. The Bulls did not.

 

 

-MEMO TO THEO AND THE PUSSYCATS…

It ain’t workin’! The, ahem “team” you have assembled is playing at a breathtaking, .294 clip! That, my dear pussycats, works out to a mucho-robusto, 48-wins…and THAT is rounding up their 47.62 result based on a 162-game season.

 

Reasons to support my hypothesis:

 

-The St. Lousy RedTurds. Year in and year out, they are consistently-considered-contenders. Like all other teams, they must deal

with free agency; arbitration and retirements of key personnel. No?  After winning the World Series in 2011, they lost…NOT ONLY…their manager, Tony LaRuusa, whom I grudgingly agree may have been one of the best in MLB history, but, possibly the best hitter of his era…and an all-time great in that regard, Albert Pujols…and then went out and won the pennant the next year!

AND I do not recall their fans having to have had to have put up with watching the likes of a 6′ 6″, 240-lb pile of steaming manure, toss BP to their opponents, a la Jose Veras.

 

But wait! There’s more!

As much as Theo and his Pussycats must be fans of the cable show, “Flip This House”, enough’s enough. The one guy whose having a decent season, so far, Emilio Bonifacio, is being mentioned as prime “flip” material in their “load up the minors, screw the major league squad”, atty-tude.

 

But Wait! There’s even morer!

They don’t even have the same chance as the mythologized Cleveland Indians of the film, “Major League” fame. Why? If you recall, the team’s owner, former-showgirl-widow of their owner, Rachel Phelps. As a motivational tool, manager Lou Brown puts up a life-sized, fully-clothed, cardboard cutout of Ms. Phelps. Lou tells his guys that for every win, a piece of Ms. Phelps’ clothing gets removed. This seems to work, as they go on a tear and wind up winning the pennant.

 

Here’s the thing. What self-respecting man would be motivated by the opportunity of viewing Tom, Pete, Laura, or Todd Ricketts stripped down to nothing more than stilettos, a G-string and pasties? Didn’t think so.

 

OK, time to go. Hope you all had as wonderful of an Easter weekend as we and that as the weather continues…though at a pace which would make a snail seem quick…eventually to Springtime for all…not just Hitler and Germany.

 

Remember, any time we can look down at our rosebushes instead of up at their roots, it’s a good one.

 

DaBigFatWat.

 


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