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To Cutler or not to Cutler! That is the question…

cutlerGood morrow to all on this frigid, Feel-Good Friday morning. It’s a balmy 18-degrees outside with azure blue skies and a southerly breeze, for which we are glad as that’s bringing about -15 wind chills. One can only wonder at what it’d feel like if it were from the north. Brrrrr.

 

Our  “northern-right-coasters” are  getting what us rubes got the past few days…maybe worse. Though, I must say, we had a lotta snow, which’ll be followed by more tomorrow afternoon and then forecast “highs” in negative-degrees next week. Back in ’79, the three-successive, record-setting winters we had, in snowfall and low temps, drove T-Bill to the “left-coast”. On days like today, moi can’t say that moi blames him.

 

As this will be the last issue of DaTwacks for a week-and-a-half, or so, and, as I have stuff to do as we’re leaving for Espana, tomorrow, don’t know how much I’ll get in or not, but here goes.

 

As I type this, there’s a YUGE fire at a Redi-mix plant near Hanson Park at Grand and Long. Just saw the video of the roof collapsing. Trouble is, it’s in an industrial park which is bordered by a rail yard, which effectively keeps firefighters from attacking from all sides. Gotta give those guys a tip of the cap being outside; spraying water on a fire. I mention this as we’re located 3-1/2 miles from the fire but can see the smoke from DaWat’sNest.

 

WABBIT SEASON

Let’s begin t’day’s exercise with a cartoon, shall we? This one’s Daffy Duck trying to evade his local draft board representative…something that several of us may view with some fond…or not so…memories. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ci3jhGyszKo&list=PL402AA690E37E4560&index=31 Enjoy.

 

IT’S WAYBACK MACHINE TIME. LET’S SEE WHAT HISTORTNET.COM SAYS HAPPENED ON THIS DATE IN…

 

1521,   The Church excommunicated Martin Luther a mere 4-years after the posting of his “95-Theses”. After all, ya can’t get to heaven unless you raise a little hell.

 

1911,   Director of moi’s fave-western of all time, “The Magnificent Seven”, John Sturges was born.

 

1912,   Plans were announced for a new ballpark for the Brooklyn Trolley Dodgers, now known as The Doyers, which became known as “Ebbets Field”, which may have been the background for a fave-cartoon of moi’s “Baseball Bugs”. “POW! A HomAH! POW! Anuddah HOMah!”. Also, the “conga-line” of base-runners, which Cubs fans see visiting teams do on a regular basis when they watch a game.

 

1921,   Italy stopped issuing passports to U.S. emigres. Hmmm, was Lou Dobbs’ forefathers behind that?

 

1924,   King Tut’s tomb was discovered, paving the way for Steve Martin to “…get a million dollars…”, which he says is a necessity in order to “not” pay taxes on them.

 

1929,   The introducer of “Spaghetti westerns”, e.g., “A Fistful of Dollars”, Sergio Leone, was born.

 

1959,   Alaska became the 49th state in the union, thus allowing for Sarah Palin to become a candidate for Vice-President of the United States of Amercia. More on Caribou Barbie, later.

 

1959,   Fidel Castro took over command of the Cuban army. “Cuba, si! Yanqi, NO!”

 

1990,   Panamanian strongman, Manuel Noriega was arrested by U.S. troops who’d played at ear-splitting volume, the cover version of the Bobby Fuller Four’s “I Fought the Law”.

 

1996,   Motorola introduced the “flip-phone”. Neanderthal that moi is, moi still uses one.

 

MOST ADMIRED PEOPLE IN AMERICA …

-Politically and socially interesting are the results of Gallup’s “Most Admired People In America For 2013″.

For example, though his popularity numbers are at their lowest, ever, Barry polled the highest with 16%.

 

But wait! There’s more! Pope Francis only drew 4%, which could be considered as not bad, as he’s only been on the job a few months.

 

But wait! There’s even morer! Stubya ALSO drew 4%. Forget politics and just think about that. The man who started us on the worst decline in a half-century, not to mention the Iraq war, is admired by as many folks as the Pope! Or should I have ended that with a ?

 

But wait, again! There’s even more!

 

In a possible harbinger of bad news for DaGOPers in ’16, Hillary was the most admired woman, with 15%, albeit a decline from the 21% she got in ’12.

 

But wait, again-er! There’s even morerer!

 

Semi-not-surprisingly, Oprah was second with 6%, ahead of the First Lady who polled 5% BUT she was tied by none other than Caribou Barbie with 5%. Caribou Barbie. Go figure.

 

EQUAL TIME…

-Last week, MSNBC commentator and guests on a show where she was subbing, got into hot water after they joked about a pic of Mittsy’s family showing him holding his African-American adopted grandchild, front and center. Did Caribou Barbie rush to her defense, staunchly defending her 1st Amendment rights? Uh-uh. Not a chance. Nope, she ripped it.

 

Here’s the thing, if I’m chastising Phil Roberston, I guess hafta mention this. However, am I the only one who up until this brouhaha had no idea that Mittsy had an adopted African-American  grandchild? That there’d been no mention of this since he began his run for president in mid-2011? The entire family was on stage at any number of political functions where the kid was never shown. Why would that be?

 

Here’s an excerpt from “The Hollywood Reporter’s” story: “On seeing the photo, one panelist, actress Pia Glenn sang, “One of these things is not like the other … and that little baby, front and center, would be the one,” as Harris-Perry laughed. Another panelist, comedian Dean Obeidallah joked that the image “sums up the diversity of the Republican party.” Harris-Perry cracked up the panel of four with the notion that Kieran could some day marry North West, the child of Kanye West and Kim Kardashian. “Can you imagine Mitt Romney and Kanye West as in-laws?” she asked.”

 

Sorry but I think that’s funny. Kimye and the Romneys? Come on! Kim, all-boobs-busting-out-all-over-the-place with all-prim ‘n’ -proper, Ann and Mr. “George Bush Hates Black People”, Kanye, with Mitt?

 

Think what you want but I wouldn’t be surprised to see this as an SNL sketch. Why? Because the incongruity is just too, too rich.

 

 

HEADLINES…

 

“Beanie Baby billionaire: I don’t deserve prison”. Why not? Well his mommy was schizo and his daddy wasn’t nice, neither, and he’d made charitable donations. Makes sense…right?

 

“After hack, Snapchat to make App More Secure”. This after the owner turned down a $3,000,000,000.00 bid from Facebook. Not saying it will but this might go down as the biggest dummasserest move of the year.

 

“Law license for man who has lived illegally in U.S. for 20-years”. Just about speaks for itself, no?

 

“Passengers on icebound ship rescued”. This being the research ship trapped in the “ICE” at the South Pole…during the Pole’s

SUMMER?!?!?!?!?!?!?

 

 

DUCK SEASON

 

TUBULARLY SPEAKING…

-Many shows are returning after their December hiatus, one of which is “Revolution”, returning next Wednesday.

 

-New shows…CBS has a newbie, which seems like a vamp on  “The Six-Million Dollar Man”, “Intelligence”, following “NCIS” next Tuesday. It stars T-DaveS and moi’s fave, Marg Helgenberger, who’s workin’ it at 55 like not many others.

 

-ABC has “The Assets”, which is an 8-part, mini-series, based on the book, “Circle of Treason: A CIA Account of Traitor Aldrich Ames and The Men He Betrayed”. Many of us may recall this sad part of our history. I recorded it and have it set to continue while we’re gone, as I am a Cold-War-Spy-Story, junkie, a la James Bond; any John LeCarre novel, etc. That said, I’ve read some not so great things about the show. Problem is, it’s on ABC, which is owned by Disney, which may lean it closer to the entertainment side and further from the grunt work of a decade’s worth of investigation in the finding out this traitor. Hope not.

 

BIG SCREEN ON THE SMALL SCREEN.

-Watched “Broken City” with Mark Wahlberg and Russell Crowe. Pretty good.

 

 

AND NOW…SPORT

 

THE PLAYOFFS ARE UPON US; DaBEARS HAVE JAY, TIM AND MATT AND LUVEE & LESLIE ARE SITTIN’ IN A TREE D-E-F-E-N-D-I-N-G; AND MOI’S PACKEHS HOST BILL’S NINERS, SUNDAY…

 

-Don’t know how many had the opportunity to have seen DaBears’ press-conference wherein they announced they’d extended Jay, Tim Jennings and Matt Slauson.

 

This is a good thing, guys. I’m no Bears fan, and as such, I have no blurred-vision via blue and orange sunglasses, I view these moves more anally-itically, than emotionally.

 

First, Jay. This seemed to have been a fait accompli to moi. Why? OK, who else is out there? As well as McCown did, he’s not Cutler. If he were, he’d be a starter on another NFL team. Or, to paraphrase former Bears’ GM, Jerry Angelo’s comment to the S-T’s Mark Potash, “It’s not like there’s some ‘vineyard’ of quarterbacks out there.”

 

The money, you say? Look, I’m married to and a father of teachers. That they have had to beg for a few crumbs from the table while people who can throw or catch a football; shoot a 3-pointer or hit home runs, get a minimum of $800K/year, not to mention millions of dollars, or so, says our societal-attitudes are out of whack. That said, what they gave him, $126-million over 7-years with $54-million guaranteed, is the going rate for NFL QBs. And, since we’re on the dinero, some may be worried about the cap-hit. I heard on The SCORE that ’14′s is $11.8-million. That’s not bad, salary-cap-speaking.

 

Also, what they’ve done is begin what seems to be an era of stability. Think about it. Since Coach Dikka, from Wanny to Jauron, to LuveeKravezit to MarkyMarc, those three HCs have had I-don’t-know-how-many OCs! They’ve had a fairly stable defense, which is what’s kept them halfway-credible over that time. But since the League’s gone to…almost…all-offense-all-the-time…they’ve been clearing their windshield from everyone else’s dust.

 

Now, though, they have receivers who can: 1) Run patterns; 2) Catch the damn ball; 3) Out fight a DB for a pass and actually give DCs something to worry about.

 

They also have #22, Matt Forte, who had a very good year and should continue to prosper under MarkyMarc, as well as a string O-Line.

 

Next, Jennings. Three years ago, when the Pack came here to play DaBears for the NFC Championship and they still had their “Jennings”, Greg, at the start of the game, I said to MBH, “Watch 85 undress #26. 26 can’t cover a naked woman with a dress”. Sure enough, he pantsed Tim Jennings. After that season, DaBears cut Jennings but re-signed him just before training camp. Since then, he has become a solid CB. He’s still no PrimeTime as a cover-corner but he’s a hellacious hitter; has a nose for the football  and tackles well. They’re going to need him as with Leslie Frazier joining Luvee in TB as his DC, and,  Peanut Tillman may wind up there.

 

SOME NEW TERMS IN DaTWACKS LEXICON…

-At yesterday’s news conference, Phil Emery came up with a new term, which will be added to former GM, Jerry Angelo’s “geniosity”. Our EmeryBoard, is: “Roley-coaster”. He said it several times. Not, “Roller-coaster”, as are found at Six Flags. Uh-uh. It’s a “Roley-coaster”.

 

But wait! There’s more! Now this surprised me. It’s a Trestyism, which again was said repeatedly. To give emphasis to his words, he said he wanted to, ahem, “Reinerate”. “So, to reinerate, it’s been a roley-coaster of a year which in our geniosity, will only get better.”

 

FRIENDS! TWACKERS! COUNTRYMEN! LEND ME YOUR EYES!

-Much has been said against Bears’ safety, Chris Conte. Let me be the first to say, there’s no way anyone will confuse him with Richie Petitbon. However, most knowledgeable football fans know that DBs’ effectiveness is often based on the corresponding effectiveness of the pass rush. And, with Julius Peppers as often as not playing  like a JellyAss Pooper; coupled with the injuries they’d sustained, Conte and company were hung out to dry more often than they shoulda. Yesterday, Marky said that last play was an audible from zone to man which Conte did not hear.

 

Lest we forget, earlier in thje game there was the “fumble” which was not recovered by the Bears’ James Anderson, who just kinda sauntered by, not to mention the rest of the defense.

 

Lest we also forget, I watched the replay yesterday afternoon. Their All-World, receiver, Brandon Marshall, with 16-seconds left, dropped a pass with not one Packer within 10-yards of him.

 

I guess what I am trying to say, while that 4th and 8 will live in Bears fans memories just like 4th and 26 does with Packers fans, there was more involved in that loss than Conte’s not hearing an audible.

 

STABILITY…

-Just heard something on The Score. Since 1991, the team which has made the most playoff-game appearances is the Niners, with 41. The team which is second with 32 is Green Bay. Ron Wolf took over Green Bay in ’91. Since then, they’ve played the same offense.

 

It appears the Bears are trying to achieve a sense of stability as opposed to the fractiousness or lack of direction they’ve had since then on “O”. This is no rip; it’s an observation. The Bears have had this on defense. However, when it comes to offense, an 14-year-old girl’s less fickle.

 

AND NOW…BILL’S NINERS PLAY MY PACKEHS.

-Other than the “On any given Sunday” mantra of the SFC, I hold no hope(s) that my guys will win. Not with their – sometimes -

pathetic defense and its lack of a pass-rush. Yes, the forecast high has been “upped” to -2-degrees, with a northwest wind of 14 mph, causing a -20 wind chill. Still, as a bit warmer-weatherly as the Niners are, they’re “O” is built for this kind of weather. Well, as “built” as any can be under those weather-conditions. MY DVR is set.

 

That said, I’m a fan and Bill and I will have to wager our usual beer, of which he’s won the last three.

 

-I know I’m dreaming but I sure hope they can find a way to play well enough on defense so as to not embarrass themselves on national TV and get a win.

 

OK, time to go. Have some last-minute packing to do. Will be back soon and reconnect with all y’all. We’re heading to “highs” in the upper-40s/low-50s, with some occasional rain. Arriba!

 

In the meantime; in between time; remember any day we can look down to where our rosebushes are sposetabe under the snow

instead of up at their roots is a good one.

 

Until mid-month or sooner, Adios,

 

DaBigFatWat

 

 


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