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Snowden’s dad wants a fair trial… Laurel and Hardy can help.

It’s a beautiful late-September…I mean, July…morning. While it’s a tad chilly for July, at least it’s sunny, which takes the edge off the 65-degrees or so that we’re experiencing. Though I like summer to be - well, summer –  these cooler temps beat the crap outta the 90s.

 

Let’s go to the Wayback Machine and see what may have happed on this date in history in…

laurel

1588, The Spanish Armada was spotted off the British coast, which prompted the comment which presaged George Armstrong Custer’s, “Where the hell did all these Indians come from?”

 

1693, The French destroyed the Army of the Grand Alliance at The Battle of Neerwinden. Probably because they got in their way to Farwinden.

 

1883, Benito Mussolini was born.

 

1921, Adolph Hitler became president of the National Socialist Party. They said he’d never mount to much of anything, so not to worry.

 

1996, A US Federal Court struck down the child protection portion of the 1996 Communications Decency Act. Guess they thought parents could just, ahem, “change the channel” if they didn’t like what was on the tube.

 

WABBIT SEASON

“THAT’S SOME CATCH, THAT CATCH-22″ “IT’S THE BEST THERE IS.”…NOT ANYMORE

-Those famous lines are from one my fave novels of all time, “Catch-22″ by Joseph Heller. Army Air Force Capt. John Yossarian makes that observation to his flight-surgeon, Doc Daneeka after Doc explains that he can only ground a flier if he’s insane. But, in order for him to do that, the flier has to ask to be grounded. However, since asking to be grounded implies knowledge that flying daytime bombing missions is inherently dangerous, therefore, if one asks to be grounded, one must realize that danger and if that is so, they have to be sane, as only an insane person would voluntarily take part in such dangerous activity. Ergo, they cannot be grounded. “Catch-22″.

-”Catch -65″. A phone rings…

“Chicago Public Schools. May I help you?”

“Hello. I just received my Termination Notice and would like to apply to cash in my accumulated sick-days”.

“OK. How old are you?”

“64. I’ll be 65 in 2-1/2 months”.

“Well, you can’t cash them in unless you’ve worked 20-years or are 65. How long have you worked”

“18-1/2 years.”

“You have to have worked 20-years or be 65.”

“But I was laid off and the notice says in order to cash them in, I have to file my papers before August 9th.”

“That is correct.”

“But I won’t be 65 till October.”

“Yes. I heard you.”

“So, how do I cash them in?”

“You have to be 65, now, or be working when you resign to cash them in.”

“But you terminated my position. I didn’t quit.”

“Yes. I understand”.

“So, how do I cash them in?”

“Try finding another job with CPS, then retire when you’re 65.”

“What if I can’t find another job?”

“You have a year.”

“What if I can’t find one in that time?”

“You lose the accumulated sick-days.”

 

This is pretty much the way things also went with the CTU, too. It’s part of the new contract. Previously, there was a downward sliding scale.

 

Time for Catch-22 to step aside.

 

Oh yeah…the search for employment continues.

 

Please understand, I am fully aware that this is not part and parcel of the way business is conducted in the private sector, in which I worked in the collections biz for 38-1/2 years. This was part of the CBA; always has been and only changed with the last CBA which began after last year’s strike. But I can say that after spending those 38-1/2 years in collections, I can smell out a deadbeat trying to get out of its responsibilities. It’s not the being 65. One can wait till their birthday for that. It’s the arbitrary imposition of the two-weeks to file; get another job by 65 or within a year or lose them. In the instance to which I refer we are talking, nearly, a year’s salary.

 

Funky deadbeats.

 

KEEP IT UP, ANTHONY!

-Man, oh man! That Weiner guy sure keeps it up, huh? I mean, he’s running one thing after another up his flagpole. What a high-riser, is he?

 

THE NEW POPE.

-I like this guy. Despite my anathema towards the Church Hierarchy…and most organized religions, for that matter…I like this guy. It may be that of all of the garbage which has gone on in The Church, he seems to be the first who embodies the teachings of Jesus…at least the way they were taught to me.

 

SNOWDEN’S DAD WANTS HIS SON TO GET A “FAIR TRIAL”.

-This one’s been around for a bit. It seems Fast Eddie Snowden’s plight is a cause of worry for his dad. Really? Here’s the thing. He, the Dad, says he’s afraid his son won’t get a “fair trial” in the U.S. OK, fair enough. Let’s take a look at this. Fast Eddie took super-top-secret intel to, ahem, China; then went to Russia; went on TV and openly admitted what he’d done…in other words, admitted his guilt. And now his Dad’s afraid if he returns here, he won’t get a fair trial.

 

Hasn’t he ever heard of George Zimmerman?

 

ANOTHER MASS-SHOOTING.

-When these mass-shootings occur, am I the only one wondering where the hell all of NRA Pres.’ Wayne LaPierre’s “good

guys with guns”, are?

 

OK, time to lighten things up a bit.

 

DUCK SEASON

 

LAUREL & HARDY

-Don’t know how many of you have access to the digital broadcast-TV channels but there are some pretty good ones. Sunday morning, I really wasn’t interested in seeing anything about Rahmses or his minions, so began surfing. I hit on one of the “Me” channels, which they call, “Movies”. (Locally, it is 50.2).When I tuned in, there were Stan & Ollie up to their usual goofiness. These guys were around during the “Silent Era”. In other words, a long time ago. What’s great is, they are still LOL-funny.

 

My Dad’s fave was, “F-I-inger” W-I-iggle” “Finger Wiggle”.

 

SPEAKING OF ENJOYMENT…

-Is there anything better tasting than a tomato picked fresh off the vine? This is their time and we are making the best of it, what with BLTs; burgers w/L & T, etc, or just a plain tomato.

 

SNOW WHITE & THE HUNTSMAN

-Finally watched this one. It was pretty good, though I think Angelina Jolie would have been better as the evil queen, Ravenna. Still, Charlize Theron was really good.

 

Having read most of these “fairy tales” as they were written, these non-Disneyfied films are far closer to the real stories and, to me, much more interesting.

 

J.J. CALE DIED.

-This may not mean much to some but if I said, “The guy who wrote, ‘After Midnight’ and ‘Cocaine”, I’m guessing you’d identify with it. If you ever want to hear the best rendition of “After Midnight” listen to his version. Here’s a link for you. You may notice he has a pretty good rhythm guitar-player whom he lets do some pickin’ too. Enjoy. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5WUeOEkl270

 

SO WHAT SEASON IS IT NOW?

BASEBALL SEASON

WHISKEY! TANGO! FOXTROT!

-So, DaFlubs traded their best starting pitcher, Matt Garza, for some “prospects”, after having done so with Scott Feldman and then again with Alfonso Soriano; their best right-handed, power-threat, for a middlin’ prospect and some relief from the Johnny Mac and Kenney Crane contract they gave him.

 

So, I get an email from Twacker Brewski who tells me he is “too much happy” and that without this guy, Sori, they will experience “better losses”. From that, I inferred that he meant we’d play better fundamentals on “O” and “D” but was fully prepared for the – proverbial – bottom to drop out. BUT…at least they’d be playing sound baseball. I agree with him. The old saying that if we lost with them; we can lose without them is well in play now.

 

So, I was ready for the bottom to fall out and what happens, they go to the reigning World Series champs, the San Francisco Giants and sweep them. Yes! You read that right…s-w-e-e-p them! They went on a West Coast trip and came home 6-4!

 

Hence my, WHISKEY! TANGO! FOXTROT!

 

Fear not. They host the 43-61, BrewTurds for three, starting tonight. They’ll probably get swept.

 

DARWIN BARNEY.

-Is there a guy who looks more lost in the batters-box than he? Don’t get me wrong; he’s got a Dyson in his mitt and the range. It’s just that, well, hitting him in the #8-hole isn’t helping him.

 

I had mentioned how I thought putting him #2 would help him to Twacker Tom. He mentioned that there’s a “new” look at the 2-hole , where managers are hitting their – usual – #3, guys…their best hitters…2nd in that they get 100-odd more plate appreances over a season. That reminded me of the S.F. Giants of about 50-years ago. They had Willie Mays, Orlando Cepeda, Willie McCovey (of McCovey Cove fame) and Felipe Alou among their starters. They would hit Mays, yes, The Say-Hey! Kid, 2nd followed by McCovey, Cepeda and/or Alou; with occasional flipping of the latter three. The thinking was, why not get Mays more A/Bs. After all, he was one of the best playing at the time. And, he could put the ball – almost – where he wanted to. Note, Mays, McCovey and Cepeda are all in the HOF. How’s that for a troika?

 

Anyway, with that in mind, it seems that Castro’ll be our #2-hitter, followed by Rizzo and whomever.

 

As the trade deadline isn’t till midnight, Thursday, don’t expect the Wood Cutter to still be here by Friday. He’s a nice, steady, vet who’s done a nice job. But with Dejesus returning form the DL and Junior Lake, (who has dried up a bit since his first week),

the heir apparent in left or right, he’s gone. After going 15 for his first 30, he ain’t had a hit, by the by.

 

SORIANO.

-So, Sori goes back to N’Yawk and what does he do? Not much…just 4 for 5, with a homer and the game-winning hit in the bottom of the 9th. Go figure.

 

NFL NETWORK, aka, THE NEW YORK JETS, SIO.

-I swear, every time I tune in to the NFL Network, they’re doing a story on the Yets. Well not EVERY time. Yesterday afternoon, they were showing the Giants. Someone needs to tell them, along with ESPN, that there’s a whole funky-country out here with 27 teams other than those two and the Pats.

 

OK, gonna close for now. Will cover the Bears, Pack and others another time.

 

Remember, any day we can look down at a daisy beats looking up at its roots.

 

Take Care. HaGooDay.

 

DaBigFatWat

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