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MEDICICNAL POT APPROVED IN ELLA NOISE!

Good morrow, Twackers! How are we all, today? Tis Friday and our worker-bee-Twackers have <8-hours till the weekend! My fondest wish is that one day, all of you will be able to look someone straight in the eye and say without fear of refutation, “To me, every day is Saturday”. Weatherwise, it’s been crazy. Overnight, there was a YUGE thunderclap; followed by an audibly-strong downpour. I say this, as they both awakened me from a rather sound sleep. Then another, which I’ll mention later. The forecast is for showers and storms off and on all day; with a few early tomorrow but Sunday, the day on which our daughter, Janet marries her love, Emmanuel, sunny with a high of 77.

 

OK, let’s get to it, or, as the Anthony Weiner campaign would say, Onward and upward!”

 

Let’s go to Historynet.com…our “Wayback Machine”…and see what happened on this date in history in…

legalpot

216 BC, Hannibal…no, not THAT Hannibal…defeated the Romans at Cannae. Hmmm. Is Cannae the root word of “cannibal”, as in “Hannibal the…”

 

47 BC,  Caesar defeated Pharnaces at Syria, after which he said, “Vini, vidi, vici”, which translates to “I came. I saw. I conquered”,

which led to adult film stars to wax Caesarian, “Vidi, vici, vini”.

 

1790, the first U.S. census was taken becoming the precursor to “gerrymandering” which led to the eventual ridiculousness we all know as the United Sates House of Representatives.

 

1876, holding “Aces & Eights”, Wild Bill Hickock is shot dead while playing poker in Deadwood, S.D.

 

1934, German President, Paul Von Hindenburg died, paving the way for young Bavarian, Adolph Hitler to become Chancellor.

There’s nothing to see here, folks. Just keep moving.

 

1964, USN destroyer, Maddox, is allegedly fired upon in the Gulf of Tonkin by North Vietnamese patrol boats, which led to the “Gulf of Tonkin Resolution”, which we later found out was nothing but bogus; which led to 58,282 dead; 303,000+ wounded and 1645 MIA. Let’s keep starting “wars of choice”, shall we? I mean with this kind of info, why wouldn’t we?

 

1990, Iraqi forces invaded Kuwait…which led to “Desert Storm…which led to, ahem, “Iraqi Freedom”.

 

Sorry. Some of those weren’t very FEEL-GOOD but they did occur on this date.

 

WABBIT SEASON

 

GET BEHIND WEINER AND PUSH!

-Sorry. Just can’t resist this. It just keeps popping up.

 

BALL STATE UNIVERSIY WILL NOT TEACH “INTELLIGENT DESIGN”.

-The school’s president, Jo Ann Gora, sent a letter top faculty and staff saying intelligent design is not appropriate content for science courses in that intelligent design is overwhelmingly deemed by the scientific community as a religious belief.

 

There IS hope for Indiana as long as Ms. Gora remains at her position. For the life of me, I cannot understand how folks cannot differentiate between scientifically proven facts and religious beliefs. This is not to denigrate those who have those beliefs. It’s just that this is “faith-based” thinking, and as we all know, by definition, faith is belief without proof, and in order for something to be accepted as a scientifically-proven fact, well, it has to have been proven, er, uh, scientifically. Or, as moi says, “Intelligent Design” is silly, as what “designer” with any kind of intelligence would make beer bad for us and broccoli good?

 

MEDICICNAL POT APPROVED IN ELLA NOISE!

-Far OUT! Well, not exactly. Y’see, ya can’t grow yer own. But hey, if you know someone who has a scrip and they’re feelin’ generous, well, um…hmmm, smoke up, dudes and dudettes!

 

SERIOUSLY, THOUGH…

-I was wondering, do the folks who actually live in Las Vegas call themselves, “Vegans”?

 

I’LL LIVE ON THE KINDNESS OF OTHERS…

-Those words…or something like them…are spoken by Scarlett O’Hara at the end of “Gone With the Wind”. How do they apply here? Well, Lord of the Fleas, Edward Snowden, who’s been cooped up in an airport terminal in RusskieLand, has been granted a year’s worth of temporary asylum. This, of course, brought about all sortsa protestations from American pols. When this happens, does the local weather bureau warn of an “ozone action day”? Just askin’.

 

But wait! There’s more!

 

He also has been offered a job at the Russkie version of Facebook.

 

AN TRIBUTE TO AN OLD FRIEND.

-Read that an old high school and college friend of mine, Mike Dooley, had passed away a couple weeks ago due to complications from Alheimer’s. Yesterday, the S-T had a full-page obit on him. I knew he’d taught Spanish at the CPD Academy but was unaware of all the other good things he’d done, one of which was finding headstones for fallen police officers’ graves which were in disrepair or non-existent. Like me, Mike met his wife at Northeastern Illinois.

 

I have two vivid memories of Mike. One is from high school. Mike was one of those guys who when he laughed, he also blushed. I used to sit behind him and would whisper something stupid; then snortle through my nose. He’d try tp stifle his laughter but, like a thermometer, the reddening of his neck and face just grew and grew. He’d then get reprimanded. I know. High school stoopid.

 

The other is from college. One winter’s Friday night after getting “beered up”, we were walking down an alley in Lincoln Square near the Western Avenue El station when we had to “release the Kraken” of too much beer. As we were copiously making  proverbial, “yellow-snow”, Mike turned to me and said, “A friendship consummated in beer is a friendship forever”.

 

Godspeed, Mike.

 

DUCK SEASON

 

SWORDFIGHT CALLED ON ACCOUNT OF RAIN.

-As moi was watching ‘GN Morning News doing a live-shot of a swordfight which will occur at the Bristol Renaissance Fair, Father Zeus Almighty was causing a super-heavy downpour here at Da Wat’s Nest, which is 4-miles due west of their studios. As they switched to their morning weather guy, outside with the “knights”, he was saying how they needed to seek shelter…and…down came the rain.

 

WHO’LL BE THE NEW EYE-CANDY ON NCIS?

-Just read that Cote d Paolo, the Chilean actress who plays Israeli-American agent, Ziva David on CBS’ NCIS, has left the show.

OK, this show’s a real sausage-fest, already. Yes, Pauley Parette’s quirky “Abby” is Ok but….

 

Yes I know. Terribly MCP…and women only watch Mad Men for the stories…not Jon Hamm.

 

“PERCY JACKSON: SEA OF MONSTERS”.

-This film opens next week. You may recall the original in the Rick Riordan series, “Percy Jackson and The Olympians.:The Lightning Thief”. They’re written more for kids. As a matter of fact, I became aware of them through my live-in elementary school-liberryan. I read them all and again, yes, they’re written on a kids’ level. For example, in “The Lightning Thief”, Persephone is played, quite seductively, by Rosario Dawson who broadens the appeal to even high-school boys. That said, they use the classical Greek names, not the more easy to recall/pronounce Roman names. Also, he uses situations which vaguely mirror various myths, which Percy, son of Poseidon, encounters as a teen-ager, with which kids can empathize…while learning…which never hurts. These are “big-screen-worthy” in that they rely…hell, they have to…on CGI, inasmuch as there aren’t many Hydras, Krakens, etc., around for them to use now, are there?

 

“2 GUNS”.

-This one got 3-stars from Richard Roeper. It stars Denzel Washington and the original, “MarkyMark”, Mark Wahlberg.

Denzel is another of that cadre of actors who, despite whatever kind-of-a-movie they may be in, always does a credible job. MarkyMark, is OK. He’s neither fish nor fowl. He’s likeable enough but is nowhere near Denzel, Clooney, Crowe, et al.

 

This is  one we may wait for the neighborhood show or even the tube.

 

AND NOW…SPORT

SORRY. SOME NOT-SO FEEL-GOODS COMING. HELL, IT’S AUGUST, WHAT COULD THERE BE?

-The S-T’s Rick Telander has a very interesting column on DaFlubs ‘n’ Bears and what their futures may hold. It has more to do with organizational stuff but you may find it interesting. Yes, it does say nice things about a certain football team some 200+ miles to the north. It also says nice things about a certain baseball team 300-miles to the southwest. Unfortunately, it is not in today’s electronic edition.

 

Basically, it echoes Jerry Krause’s claim that, “…organizations build championships”.

 

I AM NOT, NOR HAVE I EVER BEEN, A WHITE SOX HATER…JUST NOT A FAN.

-Believe it or not, I’m not. I’m just not a fan of the team. I cannot say that about a certain fan of theirs whom none of you know…present company excluded…who could not just enjoy their 2005 success. No. He had to “rain on my parade” in that we ChiTowners, finally, had a pennant winner and eventual World Series Champ. But that wasn’t enough. He had to “rub my nose in it” that they won and my Cubs sucked.

 

Folks, it’s not like the Yank Mes or RedTrurds play here…nor the Packehs, Patriots, Spurs, Heat, nor Wings…until a few years ago…whatever, play here. So, when we have a winner…even if we’re not fans, big, small, bandwagon-jumpers, whatever, it’s cause for celebration. That said, after his action, my ‘tude became, “So what?”. Sorry.

 

Having said that, Arnold, Bill and Nick, man I feel for you guys. Perhaps it was the false-hope provided by last year. I don’t know. At least we Cubs fans knew our team would suck. Be prepared for the tear-down. It’s inevitable.

 

SPEAKING OF DAFLUBS…

-Despite 22-or so- blown saves, which would have a significant effect on their record, they’re bad. It just seems if it ain’t one thing; it’s another. The Doyers are in town and are schooling them on what it takes to win; first and foremost of which is good players. Yes, they have some but the more I watch Castro, the more I wonder if he really is “it”. He has an unbelievable eye and can hit a waste-pitch in his kitchen…or 6-inhes off the plate, low and away…for a base hit but when he gets one, fat ‘n’ sassy, he can’t turn on it and drive it. Also, his defensive lapses are costly…one of which cost them the game the other night. Oh well.

 

As Pete and Roger once said, “I hope I die before I get old”…but NOT before the Cubs win a pennant and…hopefully…the Series.

 

Sorry. Again, not so FEEL-GOOD.

 

DaBEARS AND PACKEHS.

-It’s “Hope Springs Eternal” in both camps as both/each are going through restructurings.

 

DaBears. I don’t know. All we’ve seen and heard is how MarkyMarc and his fun bunch are “up-tempo” in practices; they shouldn’t miss #54, etc., etc. One thing for sure, the West Coast Offense, if/when properly employed will be far more exciting than theirs has been. And yes, Matt Forte should flourish in it. I thought that from the get-go. It made Edgar Bennett and Dorsey Levens look like top-notch running backs, when they were, basically, run-of-the-mill but they could block, catch and run afterwards. With Forte’s cutback talent, he should do very well. Otherwise, who knows? Their regular season schedule is no picnic.

 

The Pack has flip-flopped its O-Line, figuring RT Brian Bulaga and RG, Josh Sitton, are better pass-protectors; while their left-side guys seem to be better run-blockers. The good news for moi is, they seem to realize they need an effective…repeat, effective…ground game. One that eats up the clock when they have a lead in the 2nd half…not just as something to “keep a defense honest”. They have been working on their “D”, which is has been a puzzlement…working sometimes and then not so.

They drafted for the pass rush and hope last year’s #1 pick, Nick Perry, can return from injury and live up to his college rep.

They also need to find a “replacement” for Charles Woodson. Good luck with that. I love(d) the guy but as a fan relish the day when I can say, “Charles Who?”.

 

They both open their pre-seasons next week, Friday. Much to observe and learn on its way for all…including our Yets and Niners fans.

 

CLOSING WITH A SMILE…SMIRK…OR SNORT OF DERISION.

-As we have reached the point in the MLB season where all teams have played > 100-games, the S-T has the daily, “Wild Card” standings posted on their results page(s). In those standings, they list our teams, Bohicubs, Sox and Mutts as follows:

 

Bohicubsbs, 8th in NL; 10-games out.

 

Mutts, 9th in NL; 10-1/2 games out.

 

Sux, 11th in AL; 19-games out.

 

Like I said, hope springs eternal.

 

A FINAL NOTE.

-In that certain email from yesterday, fuggedaboutit. Obviously, there was a misunderstanding as to what this blog is…which is designed to be a polemic to induce thought and responses over controversial issues…to stir up the pot, so to speak.

 

 

OK, time to go as much to be done with the upcoming nuptials.

 

Take care. Have a great weekend and remember, any day we can look down at a daisy instead of up at its roots is a good one.

 

 

HaGooWeeken’,

DaBigFatWat

 

 

 

 

 

 


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