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Cheers change to jeers! Leadbellys is on the schitt list!

Good morning on this 112th day of 2013; leaving 253 to go.

It is, isn’t it, ChiTowners? At least it is for those of us who have not been affected by the floods…especially, Des Plaines. Saw on the ‘GN Morning News that River Road is still closed from Miner, (Dempster) to Touhy Ave! That pretty much restricts all east/west traffic to Devon Avenue or the tollways. Man, Oh Manna from heaven, I sure am glad I’m retired and do NOT have to deal with getting to Elk Grove Village, Des Plaines’ immediate-next-door-neighbor to the west. 90′s gonnabe a freakin’ MESS!

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday

Speaking of “River Road”, that should answer any questions folks may have had as to how municipalities decide on names of streets, no?

There are mitigating steps we all can take and am saying this as we did it. A couple years ago, we disconnected several downspouts on DaRat’sNest, which were very effective. I’m disconnecting the last one, today. Did that, also, on one of DaRatette’s places and the trouble she’d occasionally had stopped. Yes, the extensions aren’t real-pretty but they sure as hell beat the alternative. No…they are not fool-proof.

 

Oh yeah…HAPPY EARTH DAY!

 

-THE BASTERD MARTATHON-BOMBER.

Why is it that just about every and/or any thing which is not single-faceted has the propensity to become a raging controversy?

I speak of the civil courts vs military tribunal trial which awaits basterd #1, (lower-case intentional). Are we in such a state of non-homeostatic politics that we cannot allow anything to occur without one side or the other bringing out their whiners to say how wrong it’d be NOT to do things THEIR way? Besides that, basterd#1 hasn’t been in custody for 72-hours yet. Give it a chance. PLEASE!

There is plenty of room for argument as to whether basterd #1 is an “enemy-combatant” or not. Either way, HE AIN’T GOIN’ NOWHERE! NOT NO-WAY! NOT NO-HOW!

Friday night, NBC’s Pete Williams outlined the 8, I believe, federal predicates to the death penalty under which he could be tried in a civil court. Thus, for those who lust for his death…moi wouldn’t mind if it were public, by the way…it’s there. In fact, I wouldn’t mind a public-hanging. That way, his cute, cherubic countenance could be seen as it morphs into his death mask. Sorry. Couldn’t help myself but after I saw that photo of that 8-year-old kid; the bomb and basterd#1 just standing there, with no concern whatsoever for that little kid, his family, nor anyone else, well you’re gonna hafta forgive me…or not…I don’t really care.

Also, lest we forget, the last time I looked, Ted Kaczynski’s firmly ensconced in his own little corner of a ClubFed for the rest of his natural life; Timothy McVeigh’s pushing up daisies after being found guilty with his co-conspirator, Terry Nichols, who’s serving a life-sentence without the possibility of parole. We do have a way of disposing of our garbage. It really doesn’t matter how.

That said, I’m curious to hear what Sen. Rand Paul, R-Libertarian, has to say. After all, basterd #1 IS an American citizen.

 

-TIME TO CHANGE GEARS. TODAY’S BIRTHDAYS…

On this date in 1870, 1899, 1904, 1916 and 1922, Vladimir Ilich Lenin; Vladimir Nabokov; J. Robert Oppenheimer; Yehudi Menuin and Charlie Mingus were born. So, to celebrate, we should all overthrow an established government; after reading how to be dirty-old-men; basking in the warmth of nuclear-radiation whilst listening to a violin/bass duet.

 

-CHEERS CHANGE TO JEERS.

Recall moi’s fairly good review of the new “gourmet” burger-joint down the street from DaRat’sNest , Leadbelly’s, a couple weeks ago? Yesterday, we decided to patronize them a second time. So, moi called, (around 11:35 AM in the morning); a young woman answered and asked if I could hold “for a minute”, a colloquialism, I know, while forgetting to actually push he “Hold” button. So, I held…5-minutes…nothing; 5 more minutes…still nothing; all the while listening to she and whomever else was with her chatting things up. I whistled; yelled to get her attention; still nothing, so I hung up. I tried calling back for an additional 10-minutes but- you guessed it – the line was busy.

We decided to call a neighboring eatery; made our order and walked over to pick it up 20-minutes later. On out way home, I took a look inside; saw they had a full house at LeadBelly’s, so decided NOT to go inside and make a scene. Still, I was pee-peed-off. So, when we got home I called back. The same young woman answered; when I ID’d myself she said, “That was me. SAH-Ree. You know that stoopid sing-songie  non-apologetic apology. Then, as if nothing happened, she matter-of-factly said, “So, what can I do for you?”, as if I’d still actually BUY something from her business. My response was, “Nothing” and hung up. If she was the owner; shame on her. If it was one of her employees, shame on them and good luck staying open with THAT kind of customer service.

 

Folks, if you want a decent burger, you don’t need to pay $9.00 for one, much less the YUPPIE-FOODIE experience by trekking out to Portage Park. Tain’t worth it, McGhee. You can go to most any decent restaurant and get the same quality meat…after all, isn’t THAT what makes a “burger”…plus sides at no additional cost. I mean, $2.00 for fries? Oh yeah, must be the Sea Salt they use, as, well, y’know, no one can get for-real Sea Salt anywhere on their own. Stay closer to yer homes and spend that $11.00 elsewhere. If it’s less expensive, use the difference as a tip for someone who gives you good service.

 

Canya get it that despite being a mere 1320-feet from DaRat’sNest…I’ll go to Mickey-D’s across the street or Dairy Queen…or Amigo Chino; Bub’s…or any other of the dozen or so other eateries within 1320 or 2640-feet of DaNest?

 

SPOILER ALERT****SPOILER ALERT****SPOILER ALERT****SPOILER ALERT****SPOILER ALERT****SPOILER ALERT****SPOILER ALERT

 

-GAME OF THRONES IS A-HEATIN’ UP!

It’s taken to the 4th-episode but the big wheels have begun a-turnin’. Not only has Jamie Lannister paid a huge price but it seems his family will as well, what with The Khalisi now in possession of – not only – The Unsullied but still has her dragons. Memo to all male cast members…don’t screw with this lady…you may wind up as the Kingsfords in here Medieval Weber grills.

 

-BOMB GIRLS.

Gave it a shot…couldn’t get into it. A couple Ratettes really like it. I thought the back-story…women working in a WWII-bomb-assembly plant, in Canada…could be worth the watch. As the old commercial once said, “I tried but I couldn’t do it”. No offense to those who did; just ain’t moi’s cup-o’-tea.

 

 

 AND NOW…SPORT

-ABANDON ALL HOPE YE WHO ENTER HERE!

DA BOHICUBS’VE DONE GONE AND AN’ DONE IT AND WE AIN’T EVEN DONE WITH APRIL!

Gotsta give it to Theo and Jed. Our FecklessFosdicks are now 5-12…a robust .294 W/L %…a mere 10.49% into the season  and we BOHICUBFANS already know they won’t get within sniffing-distance of a wall-crawling fart of anything close to 70-wins. We don’t need to be sitting next to them to know they stink! No?

With your permission, 17-errors in 17-games. And folks, these haven’t been those made by trying to make an unbelievable-play but missing. Uh-uh. These are routine plays, hit right at fielders who don’t seem to be able to catch an STD at Broadway and Buena at 2 AM on a Saturday morning! Hence, the “Big ‘E’ on the scoreboard”.

 

But wait! There’s more!

Am I the only one who’s had the thought that while Jed Hoyer was in San Diego, he may have gone to a rummage sale in L.A. sponsored by Warner Brothers, where he purchased an “Acme Manufacturing Co.” catalog from their Wile E. Coyote-collection, which he brought here to ChiTown and is using it as his blueprint for success? I mean, really! Is there a better example of a character whose “TNT-carrying model airplanes” circle around and back to him before they explode in his face? Or…jet-powered roller skates; a flying-”Bat Man” outfit; a house-sized rubber-band which doesn’t work, etc., etc., etc.

 

Wait a minute…there is Sylvester the Cat. Old “Sly” would be a good model, too.

 

Here’s the thing. It’s only April 22nd and I have little to no interest in watching them any further. This may help. In order for them to reach our “Quest For Mediocrity +1, they will have to go 19-11 over their next 30-games…playing .633-baseball, which would give them a 24-23 record. Uh-huh. And I’m People Magazine’s next “Sexiest Man Alive”.

 

What I’m saying is this. It’s one thing to be 5-12 and struggling. Patience should be the hallmark. However,  it is quite another to be 5-12 while making Wile. Coyote, SuperGenius; Sylvester the Cat; Daffy Duck; Elmer Fudd; Boris Badenov and even Bullwinkle D. Moose look like geniuses.

 

-SOX ARE TALLEST MIDGETS IN THE CIRCUS.

All’s I can say to Sox fans, Bill and Nick aside, is…leave your “Cadillac” trot at home. Their 7-11 record would only look good at the craps tables in Vegas. Otherwise, not much less-sucky than DaBOHICUBS.

 

-DaBULLS

If getting spanked by 17 holds any kind of hope for their success in the playoffs, I’m all ears.

 

-DaHAWKS

Blew one to the Preds, Saturday in a shootout. Watched with friends and fam at RatetteJo’s place. All was well until, well, they lost. Oh well.

 

-DaBEARS ‘N’ MOI’S PACKEHS.

Apparently, the oddsmakers  have yet to have caught “TrestmanFever” as it seems all of ChiTown has, as they’ve installed The Monsters of the Midway at 35-1 to win the Super Bowl. Moi’s Packehs? 10-1.

 

OK, gotstago. HaGooDay! Remember, any day we can pick a flower is better than staring up at its roots.

 

Happy Oit Day!

 

FatRats.

.

 


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